Its just about two things in reality.
The single man of discontinuity and his love for his little brother. In the midst of the horror, the little brother painted his eyes black//
Black as night, and hidden from sight, he keeps me in his arms, despite the thorns that harm...
Its just a different nowhere than the one I used to know.
Not like the one that threaded the needle through my skin, round the prison bars.
Its just, I had to close my eyes in order to hold her hand.
Hand in hand we would shut down on the world.
Some escape.
But as she broke in breathless affliction, serrated love filled her heart. Her knees buckle before the strangling powers. She touches her captor with sincere affection. The demon lies next to her, and writes words upon her forehead.
Some escape.
Same funeral. Blackbird, you always take me down. You show me, how much it hurts. And I cant help but weep about it all the time. Now, its just that I cant hold you still as you shiver. Now, I have no trees to hide my rage.
Just a blank stare. In a Dead World.
Just a weary soul picking up broken flesh. Moving it around.
I sit here clutching useless lists,
keys for doors that don't exist
I crack my teeth on pearls
I tear into the history
Show me what it means to me in this world
Yeah, in this world
'Cause I am due for a miracle
I'm waiting for a sign
I'll stare straight into the sun
And I won't close my eyes
Till I understand or go blind
I see the parts but not the whole
I study saints and scholars both
No perfect plan unfurls
Do I trust my heart or just my mind
Why is truth so hard to find in this world
Yeah in this world
'Cause I am due for a miracle
I'm waiting for a sign
I'll stare straight into the sun
And I won't close my eyes
Till I understand or go blind (till I understand or go blind)
I know that there's a point I've missed
A shrine or stone I haven't kissed
A scar that never graced my wrist
A mirror that hasn't met my fist
But I can't help feeling like I'm
Due for a miracle
I'm waiting for a sign (waiting for a sign)
I'll stare straight into the sun
And I won't close my eyes (and I won't close my eyes)
26 Those who consider themselves religious and yet do not keep a tight rein on their tongues deceive themselves, and their religion is worthless. 27 Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world.
- James 1:26-27
The Torchbearer buried his face in lies. Black sticky atrocity filling his mind until it was gushing a purple poison.
Brother. What was I to do? The pressure was mounting. Our relationship? Lord you are strong enough to carry this sin. You are always there to come back to. Lord, by definition I am a whore. I will leave you to satisfy the lies. And when you come to me I will raise wooden nails. Brother, please don't come so close.
The torchbearer is no knight. He is a wanderer. A begger. All he has is that little flame.
He is a sickly man, a shape-shifter.
His veins would bulge from his temple as his skin shifts into dark shades of blue; a desire is bubbling from his the solar plexus and he is no longer awake.
He blows out his own light, because he knows
exactly
what is going to happen
and he does not want his faithful lover to see...
How I RAGE against the kingdom.
BUT MY VISION GETS TOO WELL ADJUSTED TO THE DARK.
I SEE YOU THERE GOD!
I SEE YOUR WHITE EYES WATCHING ME LEAVE YOU FOR MY OWN DEATH!
AND I SEE YOUR SADNESS AS I BETRAY YOU FOR QUICK PLEASURE.
I USE THE HANDS YOU THAT MADE TO COVER THE THAT EARS YOU MADE SO THAT I WONT HEAR THAT YOU LOVE ME!!!
BUT JESUS, YOU SHOULD SEE THAT HOLLOW LOOK SHE GIVES ME.
IT SHINES THROUGH HER BONES.
I would re-open my wounds to dissolve her fears.
I would tear up my healing heart to make her shattered one seem more complete.
I have spent so much time, trying to make her complete.
But the fragments continue to fracture in my claws.
THE BROKENNESS CONSUMES ME EVERMORE
I AM UNEQUIPPED TO HOLD HER HAND MY GOD
WILL YOU BE THERE
WILL YOU HOLD HER MY SWEET LOVER
LORD MY TONGUE BEGS TO SING HER NAME
BUT YOURS IS FORCIBLY IGNORED IN MY BRAIN
MY FINGERTIPS ARE HOT AND RED AND I CANT WAIT
TO TURN AND LOSE MY LOVE AGAIN
if i lose your love Lord
ilosemylife
THEN AT MY FUNERAL, HER SOMMONIA WILL CRAWL OUT OF MY TOMB
AND SHE WILL NOT ATONE
NO SHE WILL GO DOWN COUGHING
THE SICKNESS WILL CRAWL FROM HER BURNING KNEES
UP INTO HER HEART
AND INTO HER EARS
CAUSE MY SINFUL SACRIFICE
JUST REINFORCED
THOSE LIES
SHE WILL TOSS AND TURN IN HER BED
UNTIL ITS GOTTA RUN DOWN HER SKIN
AND I WILL TURN IN MY GRAVE
AND I WILL WEEP IN MY YOUTH
LORD IF MY LUST IS A CULPRIT
I DO NOT WANT TO LUST EVER AGAIN
THE BLACK BEAST HAS RISEN AS MY IDENTITY
ITS JUST NOW IN HER DESTRUCTION
THAT I CALL OUT FOR SALVATION
CAUSE IF THIS IS WHO I AM
IF THIS IS WHO I AM GOING TO BE
LORD I CANT FIGURE A WAY OUT
WITHOUT YOU
LORD I JUST GOT HER VOICEMAIL
AND I THINK SHE IS FALLING FOR SOMEONE ELSE
LORD I DO NOT KNOW WHAT TO DO
DEAR JESUS I NEED YOUR HELP
5 Jesus replied, "Very truly I tell you, no one can enter the kingdom of God unless they are born of water and the Spirit. 6 Flesh gives birth to flesh, but the Spirit gives birth to spirit.
-John 3:5-6
And the spirit said to me;
"I WILL NOT CONDEMN YOU
I WILL NOT PUT YOU TO DEATH
YES, THE PENALTY OF SIN WAS DEATH
SO I DIED
YES! THE PENALTY OF SIN WAS DEATH
SO I DIED."
"AND NOW I WILL EAT WITH YOU
I HAVE STAYED WITH YOU THROUGH THE DARKNESS
I WILL COUNSEL YOU INTO THE LIGHT
TORCHBEARER, I WILL TAKE YOUR SCARS FOR YOU
FOR I AM THE LORD JESUS CHRIST
I WILL FORGIVE YOU A MILLION TIMES OVER AND A MILLION TIMES MORE
I WILL TAKE ALL YOUR WOODEN NAILS
I WILL CRAWL TO YOU THROUGH THE THORNS
WE WILL RISE ABOVE THIS WATER
I WILL BREATHE MY LIFE INTO YOUR BLACKENED LUNGS"
"JOSEPH, THE SIN AND FLESH WILL SOON BE DEAD
FOR IT IS THE CORE OF YOUR BEING I HAVE WON
I AM WHAT RESIDES THERE
WHO SHOULD STAND AGAINST ME?
NO DEMON CAN SEPARATE US!"
"BE STILL CHILD AND KNOW THAT I AM GOD"
"JUST AS I GAVE YOU A SOUL TO ENCOMPASS THE THINGS OF YOUR HEART
JUST AS I GAVE YOU A BRAIN TO CONTROL YOUR BODY
I BIRTHED YOU A SPIRIT, A HOLY OF HOLIES
IN WHICH I RESIDE
YOU WILL KNOW MY NAME"
"IN THE SIN,
YOU WILL KNOW MY NAME.
I WILL SEND MY WORD AFTER YOU,
YOU WILL KNOW MY NAME.
I WILL PULL YOU BACK TO ME,
YOU WILL KNOW MY NAME.
I WILL BLESS YOUR LIFE,
YOU WILL KNOW MY NAME.
I WILL BREAK YOUR HEART,
YOU WILL KNOW MY NAME.
I WILL TAKE YOUR BURDENS,
YOU WILL KNOW MY NAME.
YOU WILL KNOW MY NAME AND YOU WILL LIVE BECAUSE OF IT.
YOU WILL BE A SLAVE TO RIGHTEOUSNESS
AND I WILL SATURATE MYSELF IN YOU
THROUGH WHICH YOU ARE SANCTIFIED.
BUT TORCHBEARER YOU MUST CAST DOWN YOUR IDOLS."
Then my Brother and I sat in sweet silence as I took him in.
As the Christ held my broken heart in his in his scarred hands, the shadows fled my cloak and the light of his eyes brightened my face. The cancer growing on my skin was ash in the wind. I simply breathed out the poison that once had overrun my veins.
He held my gaze.
He said this to me;
" LET ME HAVE ANNIE, LEAVE HER WITH ME.
JOSEPH, I CAN GIVE HER LIFE IN A WAY YOU NEVER COULD.
